3 Reasons Why Being In A Relationship In Your 20s Is Hard | Thought Catalog
Being in a serious long-term relationship, however, limits your options. Instead of indulging in your every whim, you now have to account for. If you're in your 20s and you're in a committed, healthy relationship, To learn how you handle difficult situations, who you want to be and. Some people think that being in a relationship in your 20s makes no sense at all. They assume you're wasting away your youth; however, I couldn't disagree.
Ltd Advertisement Sep 05, at The opinions expressed in this article are those of the writer and not ScoopWhoop. I recently turned My mind keeps wandering into the relationship zone and leaves me befuddled as to what is it that I must do about them.
On one hand, I love being in relationships; they make me happy.
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- 3 Reasons Why Being In A Relationship In Your 20s Is Hard
There are also other factors like parental pressure to get married, of course! But all this thinking has made me realise one thing -- avoiding relationships in my 20s could be one of the worst mistakes I would make.
Meeting random people for fulfilling physical and emotional needs can be exhausting and consuming. For some, the answer maybe yes, but for the others, I feel you. We fear losing our focus to a relationship but one is able to focus better on the things that really matter to them when they are in a healthy relationship with someone.
There are two kinds of relationships, according to me. A happy one and a toxic one. Being single might mean more focus for some people but most people end up more confused, less focused, and without a home base to get back to after a long day of working on their mission.
There is nothing wrong with that lifestyle. One can date and meet new people as much as they want. I have been there too.
It was part fun, part frustrating. Although, I find it ridiculous when someone claims that it provides them with more fuel to get work done and achieve their set targets because it is not true! While it seems like the entire world is singing celebratory songs of singledom, and how it sets all of us free, something about the security of a relationship sets me free to do whatever I want in my work.
Unable to fulfill their instinctual and biological drives, it is no surprise that many women and men in young adulthood today develop tendencies toward self-aggrandizement, self-harm, refusal to eat, or erratic behavior. They want to move, but they cannot: They are stuck by prescribed academic expectations, cultural norms, constant comparison with others, traumatic experiences, meaningless jobs they are told they are supposed to love, or an utter lack of opportunity altogether—trapped by economics and social expectation as they were once trapped in the home.
Why Navigating Your 20s Is Hard
If we replace the man-catching preparation for marriage with the years of prescriptive, yet often inapplicable, liberal arts education, the end results are about the same: What other choice do you have? Meanwhile, the desire to become oneself, even if the urge to do so is vague, remains unsettling and unmet. For these reasons, life after school is typically disorienting. Where there was once structure and goals, there are only loose expectations and financial needs.
Why Navigating Your 20s Is Hard | Goop
Where there was once community in abundance, there are now thousands of miles between friends. Where there were once demands that you follow the prescribed goals for life, there is now an expectation that you define your own, with no guidance or support. Before you worry too much about the future, acknowledge that this is both a beginning of something new, and an ending. This is a time to take stock, to sort through your past, just as it is a time to look ahead with courage and excitement.
It is both a time of conclusions and new beginnings. The death of your past needs to be honored in order to truly step into the next phase. The god Janus had two faces for just this purpose—to look towards the future and towards the past. Your identity, like your daily routine and your housing situation, may be in flux. You are no longer a student.
You are, according to all cultural expectations, no longer a child. And yet, like most of your peers, you may not be quite sure what you are yet either. Give yourself space to grieve and relax. Allow yourself to sleep and play and get into your creative self.
Embrace the fears that may be tapping you on the shoulder, or the anxiety that may bug you in your stomach. Look it all in the eye and acknowledge that it is there.
Because this period of in-between tends to be all about the unknown, the unseen, the not-yet understood, try not to hide from the uncertainty. To pretend that all is well when you are scared or sad will only cause greater disorientation. Instead, embrace the unknown as if you could, in fact, wrap your body around the darkness and let yourself sink down.
Let it devour you and devour it back as if you are lovers, or adversaries who must tangle in order to fight.
Tangle with this death of old things, so that you can more swiftly and truly find your way through to your new identity on the other side. Then, you can sleep. Read excellent novels that wake up your heart and make time disappear. Spend time in nature. Swim in fresh waters. Give your right brain—your artistic, curious, imaginative self—some attention for a change.
Give your body attention for the sake of love, not sculpting or photos.
Remember how to play. Without the assistance of alcohol or drugs. When you embrace the uncertainty and allow your identity to be in flux, you will slowly begin to re-collect yourself. You will remember in bits and pieces who you are at your roots and who you want to be. Notice the humans who are further along in life who make your heart light up.
Learn about their journeys. Make notes on what it is about them that gives you hope. This will all help you to clarify who you want to be, and who you already are. Look into the world and see what social issues pull at your heartstrings. Then take time to notice what truly brings you joy, with no pressure or expectations.